Done right, tipping is an easy, stress-free way to enrich other peoples’ lives. Yet people fail to take the time and minimal effort to tip in the right way. Realizing that, here are a few (nine) of my thoughts on tipping:
1) Can’t afford a tip? Can’t afford the fun.
If you can’t afford (or are sweating) dropping someone a fair tip, you probably shouldn’t be doing the activity requiring tipping. Spending $100 on a dinner and then feeling pain at the $20 (minimum) tip means you shouldn’t be spending $100 on a meal.
2) Tipping tells you a lot about a person.
If you’re going to stiff someone on a tip because of what you’ve deemed to be poor service, you have a duty to tell them what they’ve done wrong to deserve such treatment. I have lost massive respect for people who justify their cheapness on allegedly bad service. “I’m not cheap,” they say, “that waiter just sucked.” That’s fine, and while a bad tip for bad service doesn’t necessarily mean someone is cheap, the two almost always seem to correlate.
If you are actually going to leave someone a bad tip (defined as below 15% on a dinner), you better tell them why. Telling their manager doesn’t count. A spineless, anonymous bad review online doesn’t count. Grow up and talk or pay up and walk.
3) Successful, good people are normally the most generous and best tippers.
The biggest lesson I have learned about tipping is from my dad. He has routinely, throughout my life, “over-tipped” people. When asked why he says, “because I’ve been there too.”
Sure, you could say, of course rich people are more generous, but that’s only because they can afford it. Wrong. I think most successful, rich people understand the value of money and have worked many bad jobs on their way up the chain. They know the value of hard work and want to reward those working hard for their piece of the world. The biggest lesson I have learned about tipping is from my dad. He has routinely, throughout my life, “over-tipped” people. When asked why he says, “because I’ve been there too.” He also believes in treating people well and rewarding earnest behavior. What goes around comes around.
So why does the pop culture myth persist that rich folks are cheap? I think this trope fits a liberal agenda that money is evil and rich people have cheated and exploited on their way to riches. It’s a helluva lot easier to cast your ballot to steal (taxation) from a rich guy who you believe hurt people on the way up. In my experience, rich people spread their money around. Ask golf caddies, valet drivers, etc. Better-off, successful people generally have a better relationship with money than poorer people. Many poorer people are bitter and think–because money troubles can predominate in life when not reigned in–that money is the root of all evil. They genuinely feel like they do not control their own destiny. Successful people know that money is freedom and their vote in the world. They naturally want to employ, tip, and help people with money because they know the secret! That’s why, I believe, people like my dad especially like to tip earnest, young people working their butts off in otherwise menial jobs. They are rewarding good work ethic as a way to “tell” the person their work is ppreciated and that he or she is doing well along the path to controlling his or her own destiny.
4) Carry singles.
Dropping an uber driver two or three dollars on a six dollar fare is easy. Even if you ubered everyday for a year, you’d spend less than $700 tipping. When Uber first started, the drivers made good money. Now the market’s saturated, so their hourly pay has decreased. Imagine if each of a driver’s, say, three rider in an hour tossed him just two bucks for a tip. The guy goes from making $15 to $21 an hour. And while $6 in a hour doesn’t seem like much, to that driver it’s huge. With the tips, he’s earning 40% more. And, anecdotally, uber drivers I have used don’t seem to be particularly well-off. A 40% raise (actually more because uber doesn’t sniff this money and the driver may not pay taxes on it) is huge to drivers. It puts food on the table. But you cannot effectively tip in the most meaningful way without cash in your pocket. Millennials may not carry cash, but from now on you will. Right?
5) Cash is king.
Tip in cash whenever possible.
Everyone prefers cash in their pocket. And a $10 cash tip is worth more than a $12 credit card tip to a waiter. My buddy Nick worked as a server part-time during our senior year of college. After weekend shifts, he’d use part of the cash tips he earned at the bars that very night. That cash was money in Nick’s pocket. No “ten days ’til payday.” No withholdings. No Uncle Sam. Just cold, hard cash in his pocket that changed his life for the better almost immediately. And Nick was always generous with this cash, so good tippers at the restaurant indirectly changed my life, too.
When you pay with a credit card, still try to give a cash tip. It shows the person you care about them and believe they should have the option to report their tips as they see fit. That’s between them and the government as far as I’m concerned. Note: When you give a cash tip on a credit card bill, write “CASH” on the tip line on the bill. This avoids confusion for the waiter and means the waiter can’t later try to “out” you as someone who didn’t tip well. This is especially important if you’re famous or well-know to be very rich. That credit card statement has your name on it, and almost anything can go viral nowadays.
6) Open bar? Doesn’t mean the bartenders don’t get tipped.
Two dollar minimum tip per drink. It’s appalling how many people hear the–admittedly beautiful–words “open bar” and lose their minds. While the bill is paid for, the bartender is making an hourly wage and likely does not see any of the tip on the bill.
7) Give tips, or own not giving tips.
It amazes me the lengths to which some guys will go not to tip. Watching people exit an airport shuttle bus is the worst. I’ve seen adult men cower and hide behind their wives to avoid tipping. And for what? $2-5? $10 at most? At the very least, if you decide not to tip someone, own it. Look the shuttle bus driver straight in the eyes, thank him, and own it. Choosing not to tip is technically your right. Cowering as you do it is pathetic.
8) A big tip can make a big statement.
Someone gives you particularly good service? Smiled as though he or she meant it? Pay your bill in cash and leave a 100% tip. Say “keep it.” You’ll make someone’s day. Beyond that, the meaningful tip will ingratiate you to that person, making life easier the next time you go there. You think you won’t get premium service from him or her the next time you go?
9) Tipping is an easy.
Quick–name an easier way to show someone you’re appreciative of them? Sure a good review or complimentary call to a manager is good (and you should do that when someone goes above and beyond), but tipping is the most meaningful way to change and affect another human’s world during the course of your normal day. And it’s only a couple bucks per day on average if you do it right. That’s less than $1K per year at a high maximum. Eat it. And if that amount hurts, you’re doing other things in your life horribly wrong. Also, tipping is a huge signalling device in selecting and maintaining friendships. If you’ve got a pal who stiffs others on tips, axe him from your life. Just tip well, and tip intentionally.
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